Tue 21 Oct 2008
Wife: ‘What are you doing?’
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : ‘Nothing…? You’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.’
Husband : ‘I was looking for the expiry date.’
–
Wife : ‘Do you want dinner?’
Husband : ‘Sure! What are my choices?’
Wife : ‘Yes or no.’
–
Mon 20 Oct 2008
–If anyone has difficulty understanding the current world financial situation, the following should help….
Once upon a time in a village in India, a man announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10.
The villagers seeing there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them.
The man bought thousands at $10, but, as the supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their efforts. The man further announced that he would now buy at $20. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.
Thu 25 Sep 2008
Last night my wife and I were sitting in the living room, talking about life…
we talked about the idea of living on life support or dying without it …
I said to her: ‘ Never let me live in a vegetative state … totally dependent on machines and liquids from a bottle…
If you see me in that state , I want you to disconnect all the contraptions that are keeping me alive, I’d much rather die’.
Sun 24 Aug 2008
These are from actual resumes:
“Personal: I’m married with 9 children. I don’t require prescription drugs.
“I am extremely loyal to my present firm, so please don’t let them know of my immediate availability.”
“Qualifications: I am a man filled with passion and integrity, and I can act on short notice. I’m a class act and do not come cheap.”
“I intentionally omitted my salary history. I’ve made money and lost money. I’ve been rich and I’ve been poor. I prefer being rich.”
Tue 12 Aug 2008
Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. “I’ll bet you $10 he’ll jump,” said the first guy. “Bet you $10 he won’t,” said the second guy.
Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money.
Wed 6 Aug 2008
How many faces can you identify in the image below?
Let’s see your answers as comments 
